A woman engaging with the #SheMatters Employment Network

I was asked to write this blog, and within seconds, I had pen to paper. I wanted to share this so other women know there is hope.

So, this is me…

Please indulge me for just one moment with this blog, I would like to take you on a journey before you understand how I am the person I am today… And to truly understand how #SheMatters has impacted my life. 

Imagine this…

It’s dark.

It’s cold.

You are alone.

Your life is no longer yours.

You have lost everything that was familiar. 

You have never been to court.

You have never been in trouble.

You get convicted. 

You lose your other half to prison. 

You have no job.

You have no money - after earning £60k-£70k per year.

You have no idea how you are going to survive…

Are you there? Are you feeling this? If not please read it again, otherwise you will not understand the journey.

Imagine on top of all of this, your mum is diagnosed with terminal cancer and given 6mths - 5 yrs to live, your mother-in-law has been diagnosed with dementia after having 2 strokes, plus you also have to move house and live 27 days with your other half before he is taken to prison. And you are battling depression, anxiety, and the need to self-harm. I never left the house. I had frequent panic attacks and many nights of insomnia. 

So that’s how I started this journey. One would easily say, “in a complete state”. - My amazing probation officer could tell you about her first meeting with me! 

The whole Justice System destroyed me. When I got the letter I was being convicted, I just broke as a human.  I couldn’t live with the shame; the thought that I’d let myself down, my family etc. It consumed me for a very long time. 

My worst nightmare unfolds; I get convicted and I am given Probation.

Well, this is where the story turns on its head…

. . . . .

Here is me, thinking Probation would hate me, chew me up, make me do stuff, be really strict, really authoritarian, like a strict Head Teacher and just keep me feeling like I’m in trouble for the whole 12 months I’m on probation…

How wrong was I??? Almost laughable now, how wrong I was. 

My journey has been nothing but surprises and nothing but positive, inspirational, motivating and humbling.

🎉 📢 Quick shout out here for the team that run the women’s group for Probation and their ability to make you feel human and not one of life’s “right-offs”. I call them my “Earth Angels”. 📢 🎉

I’ve been given the space to understand how I got here, what went wrong, but more importantly who I want to be. I’ve explored talents I never thought I had, found new passions with yoga, gardening, painting, up-cycling, and the list goes on… all because I’ve been around women who have made me believe. 

For so long, I had this feeling of hopelessness. Knowing my future opportunities were now limited and the thought of having to tell any future employer my conviction, kept me awake at night. It felt like I would never be free from this shame.

As each week passes at the women’s probation group, with each session delivered, my strength and confidence build. Then there is a conversation about Jay, the #SheMatters Employment Network, and what they do. Maybe because I’ve nattered on about wanting to do Dog Grooming, but also, because I was being believed in. 

A week later, I walked into group and you always spot the “new person” and think “you’re new, who are you?” It was Jay. It was my future looking at me at the end of the table, - I just didn’t know it yet. 

“I’ve been waiting to speak to you” were the first words Jay ever said to me. Quite funny now when I look back. Made a difference to the usual “Hello, how are you?” 

She explained the service and what opportunities were available. And like that, a chat, an email, a call, a text, and a catch up,….. and that’s it; I’m officially being trained as a dog groomer. You know when someone says something is going to happen, but you are like “we will see”? Well we did see, and it’s happening. So to any women thinking it’s all words… get ready to eat them!

It happens! 

I can tell you this, that on the 28th of November 2025 when I was sentenced, at no point did this even enter my head as an outcome. 

But this is only half the outcome. I feel privileged to have this opportunity through Jay and the Employment Network. Something for me, something I can control, and something for my forever future. However, I need to give back.

The groups have taught me things about myself I didn’t know. They have given me strength, courage, and a reason to try again. I’ve faced my darkest times and built a superior level of resilience I never knew existed, and for this reason I want to inspire other woman to be whoever they want to be, and to recognise their own self-worth and talents. 

This whole process has driven me to write a program for women. To share my experiences and show women if you believe, you can be.

#SheMatters is invaluable to any woman wanting to change her life.

It truly makes you believe you matter.

Just because you have a conviction, it doesn’t always define you. 

This has been the hardest fight of my life, both mentally and emotionally, and unfortunately I still have more pain to face; but with Jay, #SheMatters, and the amazing women I’ve met along the way, not only do I have unwavering support, I have a reason to keep going. 

I cannot wait to walk through the door on my first day and I can look back and know it is all over and it’s Ok to look forward. 

So that’s me. That’s my story. Sorry it’s long. If you meet me in real life ever, you will fully understand (haha).

I’m excited to be a part of whatever this is going to be and look forward to this unexpected adventure. 

Forever grateful and forever humble.